Lancastrian Jokes

My web hosting service  shows me the search terms people use to reach my website. Among last month’s was “Lancastrian jokes.”

Well, to get to the point, I felt very sorry for this poor soul, trawling the Internet in a perhaps vain search for Lancastrian jokes. So I decided to come to the rescue with these. Who said the House of Lancaster wasn’t a barrel of laughs?

Knock knock!

Who’s there?


Ida who?

Ida given up Maine long before this if you’d only asked sooner.


Doctor, doctor, I need an heir!

Don’t stand here telling me about it—talk to your queen!


What is black and white and red all over?

A Lancastrian zebra!


Why did the Lancastrian cross the road?

To defect to Edward IV.


How many Lancastrians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change the light bulb, one to pray with King Henry for the welfare of the new light bulb, two to bring the Duke of Suffolk and the Duke of Somerset their own light bulbs, two to hold Queen Margaret’s train while she watches the bulb being changed, and one to stand against the door so the Duke of York doesn’t find out.



5 thoughts on “Lancastrian Jokes”

  1. Don’t you mean the Duke of Somerset, rather than the Duke of Beaufort?
    It was Edmund Beaufort, Duke of Somerset, wasn’t it?

  2. Thanks, Karen!

    Judith, you’re absolutely right, thanks! A slip of the keyboard–I’ve been away from the Wars of the Roses gang for too long.

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